Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I have complete contempt for traitorism

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

What disturbed you today?

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I see through liars

What are the most shocking facts about the Bollywood industry?

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

Are you worried that the 2024 US presidential election will result in a close race?

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

What would happen if Kakashi and Naruto switched places?

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

What does it mean if someone asks if it’s pink?

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

Why do flat-Earthers think the Earth is flat?

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I have a reading level above third grade

Has your mother ever walked in on you at an inappropriate time?

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

Humans Age Faster at 2 Specific Times in Their Life, Study Finds - ScienceAlert

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

Why do gun lovers think their right to own a weapon supercedes everyone else's right to be safe and not be shot?

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I can read

Are people who cite the 2nd Amendment honestly familiar with what it establishes?

I don’t cotton to rapists

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I can count

Is it possible to make cars that run on water instead of gasoline or other fossil fuels? Why haven't we done so yet?

I understand how hurricane paths work

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

What shocking family behavior did you read about in India?

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I have complete contempt for fakery

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

Is Daenerys Targaryen really the most beautiful woman, or is everyone saying that just to flatter her?

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

Do handsome guys intimidate women or people in general?

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

What do flat earthers think about Antarctica?

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I don’t buy bullshit

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I actually pay taxes

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

If someone works for me, I actually pay them